I dunno why but I feel so f*cking depressed/sad today. Whenever this moment comes, I suddenly look back at how I lived my life and my plans on how I'll be living it for the rest of my life. Right now as I'm writing this, I feel as if I'm not sure as to where to go or how I'm gonna be.
As I've always mentioned in my previous posts, my mom's departure for the US is one of the major contributory factors of my current state. But I knew that this would be coming....
Going back... Sometimes I wonder what my real purpose is. Sometimes I think of what I really want to do in my life. Sometimes I know what I want, only to be unsure and doubting after quite some time. Maybe it's inappropriate for me to think about things too much because I tend to freeze and end up doing nothing.
I want to cry really... to let out the frustrations out of me. Iniisip ko tuloy yung sermon ng priest last Sunday. It's about frustrations. We feel such daw because we tend to things beyond our capacities... because we want too much materially, physically, emotionally.... that frustrations cause our sadness in life. We should be thankful and happy because Christmas is near. We should welcome it with happy faces and hearts. Life is supposed to be a happy one. We are the ones who are making it difficult for ourselves.
Yep, I guess they are true but I just can't seem to get the clouds off me. I hope G could simply make pitik my nose or tickle me.
2 comments:
i feel the same too. parang i wanted everything to be perfect in my life. kaso its not that easy.
pero im sure we can move way past this stage.
It's okay to cry... let it out. Sometimes we just need a good cry.
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